Big Laugh - Big Dreams

I have a big laugh.

I'm that person in the cafe who turns heads because I simply can't laugh small. Or sneeze small, for that matter. I'm okay with that.

I often write about really deep spiritual concepts on here, and I like that content. I imagine that's why you're here. I think about and practice a lot of spiritual concepts and I love researching, writing and discovering that information. I have a new goal of really making my work reflect more of me. I value transparency and vulnerability. The good and the bad, the light and the dark, the serious and the hilarious. To this end, I will be sharing the less serious and the other parts of me -- the big laugh, the sly sarcasm, the coffee cravings, the person who says randomly "I need more Eminem in my life," the evening living room dance parties, the dyslexia, the control freak, the lazy, the one who once used "beer in the bathtub" as a therapeutic tool, the environmental activist and the person who laughs at fainting goat videos while simultaneously feeling bad for the goat and eating goats-milk gelato.

Which is what I did last night. It was my one year anniversary with my boyfriend, and we enjoyed a fantastic dinner at a small restaurant called Eva in the Tangletown neighborhood of Seattle. They didn't do wine by the glass, so we split a bottle over lamb leg and delicately roasted organic sweet potatoes and beets, carrot soup, and rustic bread. We stared each other deeply in the eyes and talked about how wonderful our year was. We shared our visions of the future. We let ourselves be in love and share our connection.

Then we decided to top off the evening with dessert and stopped for gelato at the Fainting Goat in Wallingford. There's something I like about being dressed up in a non-dressy place. It's about making the mundane special.

Everything about me feels big right now -- my laugh, my dreams and aspirations, my vulnerability, my nail beds, my appetite and my desire to connect. To connect to the inner part of me that is also you, that part that we share that make us one. To that end, I'll be sharing more of me as a footbed for connection.

Sparkly dress, big earrings, one too many rings, watching YouTube how-to's on updos, endlessly researching the mind and how we relate, everyday meditations, living in a world of feeling-emotion-vibration, relating, laughing, holding space, impatience, five books going at once, morning routine, oils over perfumes, flour-less pumpkin pancakes for breakfast. . . .

Somedays, I Feel Like a Spy

Some days, I think I would make a perfect spy. On those certain days, people I interact with don't recognize me. I can walk by and wave stand next to them at the grocery store and all I get are blank stares.

Other days, I feel like I'm invisible all together. Just last night on the drive home from work, not one but two people nearly ran me over. They didn't see that I was there and they swerved into my lane. Twice in under three miles I had to slam on my brakes and swerve. Also, twice in under three miles, I yelled a string of cuss words that would make my dad stand up and salute. But I digress....

I've written ad nauseum about how we are energetic beings first and foremost, and that our energetic blueprint lives inside of and instructs our physical human bodies. If you've ever watched a really good actor, you see that the energy they embrace allows them to become a completely different character. In the same body, they become a different person. Which begs the question, if we can choose to play a character by changing our energy, then which character are you being today? And did you consciously choose it?

Today, I walked around in the neighborhood where I work part time as a physical rehabilitation specialist for folks with spinal injuries. Many of my clients work in one of the local businesses, and as I shopped for groceries during the lunch hour, I stood in line next to a regular client. I smiled, and he politely smiled in return, no form of recognition in his eyes. I could have said something, could have told him it was me, but instead I chose to watch the energy exchange as a type of experiment. On the way back to my car, I saw my co-worker through the window of our office and she had the same reaction -- a polite smile as she turned away. When I stopped and pulled the door open, she exclaimed, "I didn't even recognize you!"

You could say that both greetings were out of context. That we place certain people with certain contexts in order to remember them. Or that maybe I was wearing different clothes or had done my hair differently. Those things can both be true. But the other thing that changed was my energy, the vibration I was set at or the character I was choosing to play.

When the intention for my day is to be a rehabilitation specialist, my energetic vibration changes to support it. If I like the people I work with and enjoy my work environment, my vibration might also change a bit to match it. If my place of work has a strong brand or work ethos, my vibration might also change to match it.

When the intention for my day is to work as an intuitive healer, my vibration shifts accordingly. Because this is more along the lines of my dharma, or true life's work, my vibration rises quit a bit. In fact, I think it changes enough that I become a different character in the same body. In my intuitive healer character, those who interact with me from the rehabilitation specialist vibration may not recognize me.

Setting our energy, vibration or character is all about intention. When we set clear, grounded intentions with the Universe, we make energetic shifts automatically. Shifts in our personal energy field can happen instantaneously. Intentions for shifts in our environment, career or in other physical things may take more time.

I think of bigger intentions like turning on your turn signal in your car. When I was almost run over last night (twice!), I noticed that both of the culprits turned on their signal while they were changing lanes rather than before they changed lanes. They didn't look for space, didn't early signal their intentions, simply signaled while swerving. When we signal intentions for a lane change, where we're asking the Universe for a large change in our life, we need to give the Universe a little time to make space for our intention. Otherwise, we risk running someone over and creating chaos, rather than allowing for the perfect spot to open up for us.

When we set intentions for larger items, like job changes, abundance or health -- basically for anything outside of a simple vibrational change -- we must learn to be patient and have faith. When we don't, we risk creating chaos  -- chaos in our mind. How many times have you wished for something really bad and kept wishing and wishing to the point that the wish wasn't even fun anymore, but filled with anxiety? Intention setting, or manifesting, is about setting the intention (flipping on your turn signal), waiting for the Universe to make space for your request or having faith (waiting for the other drivers to make space) and being self aware to recognize our answer, even if it's not in the form we originally imagined (we get space behind the big truck, not the sports car).

Setting intentions for manifesting takes faith. Faith does not necessarily refer to any sort of theism but rather faith in the sense that there is a place for you on this planet. Faith that your heart-felt intentions and desires are heard. Faith that you are deserving, and faith that you are enough. When we set our vibration, our character, from this place -- this place of faith that we are enough -- then there is nothing that we can't manifest, change or create.

How Families Affect our Energy -- and a few tips for staying sane this holiday season

Every Sunday, my boyfriend and I do our weekly grocery shopping at the local co-op. Today was no exception, except that it seemed like all of Seattle agreed to meet at the co-op at the same time. Cans of pumpkin were hoarded into cards, along with cranberries, organic turkeys, potatoes, yams, pecan and pumpkin pies and lots and lots of wine.

Obviously, people are preparing for Thanksgiving. And my guess was that the more wine in the cart, the more they're spending it with their family.

Don't get me wrong -- I love my family with every ounce of my heart. I call both my parents and my sister weekly to talk about the trials, tribulations, successes and joys of each week. I feel blessed that my family is an integral part of my life and one of the only regrets I have about living in Seattle is the large distance between us.

My family also creates some of my most difficult spiritual and energetic challenges, and it is the energy that is most difficult for my clients to work through as well.

Raise your hand (come one, humor me) if you've experienced something like this: the holidays come around and you get really excited to see your family. You can't wait for mutual show and tell, the family traditions and rituals, and spending time together. For the first couple of days, everything feels amazing and you're so happy you made it. Then, after a little while, a melancholy sort of feeling sets in -- you start to feel a little down, perhaps frustrated, and maybe you start to question some of the choices you've made that aren't the same as your family's. For me, the overall feeling I get is of feeling stuck and confused for no reason that I can pinpoint.

Sound familiar? (If not, you're more rare than a unicorn underneath a rainbow of miracles. Good job, you).

When I read clients who have just spent a lot of time with their families, I often notice that their energy field is clogged with family energy. This is energy that says, "These are our family norms/belief systems/standard operating procedures. You've deviated from this program. Here is a reminder to get you back on track." Clients feel stuck because this energy is laying on top of their own innate energy and acting like a control.

You can think of it like a computer virus. You've got all of your energetic programs running smoothly, exactly the way you want them. You're creating your own way in the world, setting your energy high and manifesting your dreams, then all the sudden your software starts to act a little weird. Everything slows down and before you know it, you're not controlling your computer anymore -- the virus is.

Our energetic field is responsible for our whole reality. It is an intricate and elaborate system created from our belief systems, karmic patterns, past time information, present time thought patterns, emotions and creativity. We can compare our energetic field to a computer system -- a healthy energetic field is running completely on its own energy in order to create its reality, just like a healthy computer system is running only on the programs we chose for our operating system. An unhealthy energy system is one running on pre-programmed ideas or lies hidden as truths, just like an unhealthy computer system is stuck or inefficient because of crap software that we don't really use, viruses, spy ware and malware.

So, back to how family energy can act as a virus.  In order for a virus to be effective, the person planting the virus must intricately understand the system, and the system must have a weakness in order for the virus to be successful. When we are born, we knew very little about how to survive in the world. We looked to our parents to supply us with information about how the world works. In essence, we actively allowed our families to program our energetic system for us. We had to -- our survival depended on it! But it doesn't any more. Part of becoming an adult is separating from ideas and beliefs that we don't resonate with, which often means a continual separation from the energy that was pre-programmed into us and a move to reprogram our energy system with our own ideas and values.

This is how energy healings work. When I work with a client, I'm basically helping them wipe their energetic hard drive of anything that's contributing toward ill health, feeling stuck, or otherwise not serving them so that they can replace those energies with their own creativity, beliefs and personal power. When we stand in our own energy, we feel better, more ourselves. Our self esteem increases and we are able to have more certainty about our life path.

It's relatively easy to clean the energy body of foreign energy, especially of co-workers, friends, acquaintances and even romantic partners. These energies are more like extra programs that you download from the internet -- they may benefit you in the short term, but eventually they can start to cause problems. When they do, you can just uninstall. But family energy works more like a virus because that's the energy you started your life with. Family energy understands your system completely because it created your first belief systems, emotional patterns, thought patterns, and the basic, underlying story you have about your life. That story creates energetic pictures about who we are at a base level. Family energy recognizes these pictures and says, "Haha! You're still mine! You have my blueprint! You've deviated a bit, but it doesn't mean you don't recognize me! Match me, match me!"

I am in no way saying that our beloved families are consciously malicious (at least, mine aren't -- you can decide that for yourself). The impact of family energy is unconscious on the part of the family members -- it's more like their love, hope, worry and fear are more easily channelled into our sensitive systems. Family energy just works differently in our bodies than the energy of others. As one of my psychic colleagues said the other day, "You can learn and grow as a psychic, and move more and more energy and become less and less reactive to people and situations around you. But when family is involved, all bets are off."

So what can we do about it? Before I go into a family situation, I take extra time to get grounded, set my energy, hold my vibration and take extra self-pampering tools with me. I check in with myself throughout the visit to notice if I'm still holding my vibration. I set up extra energy readings and healings with my colleagues.  And I always try to employ the two best tools of all -- neutrality, and lots and lots of amusement. This holiday season, I suggest you read through my old posts that include these tools and try them for yourself.

If all else fails, at least you've got the wine  :)

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

The Need for Spiritual Tools

How do we do work on a spiritual level? How do we make that work fun and effortless?

There are many ways to work on a spiritual level, but just like most work, it's easier done with the right tools. Meditation, when done with the right set of tools, can make creating faster, more fun, and less difficult. Understanding a few concepts about how spiritual bodies work will also aid in the process.

When we work in the garden, we use a hand trowel, or a gloves, or a hoe, or other tools that help us get our work done in an efficient and productive manner. There are concepts we use to understand gardening, like "growing season," and "harvest," or "shade tolerant," and "sun-loving." We use tools and concepts in nearly every facet of our life -- why should spiritual work be any different? 

I've heard so many people complain over the years about how difficult meditation and spiritual work is. "I just couldn't clear my mind, so I stopped," or "I just wasn't doing right." Some dismiss meditation altogether, saying "It's just not for me." By the way, I used to say the exact same things! But similarly, if you showed up to do work in your garden, but didn't have the seeds, the tools, or understand the concepts, you might quit gardening right away too, because it would feel very difficult. We need the right tools for the right work!

Perhaps some of you might be thinking, "Okay, but don't I just, like, focus on my breath or stare at a candle for a while or something, and then peace comes?" Sure! You can do that, too! Mindfulness practices like that are great for reducing stress and tension in the body and mind, and allowing us to focus better at work and school. If I continue my analogy with gardening, I would compare mindfulness practices to sun, water and seeds -- just like sun, water and seeds are the building blocks to growing anything, mindfulness practices are the foundation to building a really great meditation practice.

Good gardeners know that in order to create a really amazing garden, you have to have an understanding of the type of soil. you're using, if the plants you're growing are sun and shade tolerant, which plants like to grow together, on which moon cycle planting or harvesting should take place, and which tools work best for making changes in the garden. These tools can help you create a really amazing garden that brings you a luscious harvest!

Similarly, having more meditation tools and concepts under your belt can allow you to create the bountiful spiritual life you've been looking for. I want to share with you some of the concepts and tools I use to create a beautiful spiritual garden of my own. With these tools, you can:

• Learn how to feel safe in your own body and protect yourself from others
• Learn what grounding really means and how to do it
• Learn how to have more connection with your body and your spirit
• Learn how to create what you want from a space that feels effortless
• Gain more energy and vitality for yourself
• Develop better relationships with others by learning how to have healthy boundaries
• Learn how to validate and love yourself
• Learn how to stop giving your energy away to others 
• Learn how to find amusement with the spiritual process so that the process can move forward
• Gather more understanding about who you are and how amazing you are!

Each of the tools I will share take up quite a bit of space and explanation, so I'll write separate blog posts for each. I want to leave you today with a couple of spiritual concepts about how creating in the spiritual realm is different from creating on the physical realm, and how wonderful that is for us! What we set up on the spiritual level is often what appears on the physical level, so the more we are able to understand spiritual tools and concepts to move forward on the spiritual level, the more likely it is that our body and mind will follow suit. Two concepts to think about today are this:

1. The spirit works in a realm where time and space do not exist. In contrast, our bodies and minds experience time very linearly. But time and space don't exist in the energy realm. This is why I am able to conduct readings and spiritual counseling sessions with people over the phone. Energy does not have to follow the boundaries and limitations of the physical world, so you can create unhindered! 
2. Because of #1, the spirit can create and change instantly. The body and mind take a while to catch up. We call this period between spiritual growth and physical growth a "growth period." Sometimes our growth periods are a bit uncomfortable as the body moves its way through physical time to catch up with the spirit. Sometimes there is work we need to do on the physical level to help the body and mind catch up with the spirit. Understanding this growth period can be comforting as we work to move forward.
3. Because of #1, when we work to create what we want as a spirit, the meditation for the mind is to imagine that we already have it. The spirit creates instantly. The mind and body believe in time. If the mind believes something is in the future, it will always keep us just out of reach of having it. If we can practice, in meditation, already having exactly what we want to create, the mind and body can get on board more quickly.

Try it. What is it that you've been struggling so hard to create? Meditate instead on knowing that, as a spirit, you already have it. Imagine, in meditation, what it feels, sounds, smells, and tastes like to have your creation. Allow yourself to have it. See what happens.