Emotions: Watching and Responding Rather than Reacting

Sometimes, we need to get broken down in order to recognize the need for a rebuild. Sometimes, things have to get just beyond the level we can tolerate in order for us to burst forth with change.

I practice respecting my emotions. Especially the darker ones that make me feel down, fearful, isolated or worthless. I recognize that they are just emotions and that I don't have to respond to them. Rather, I can watch them, talk to them, ask them questions, poke them with words, mindfully escape from them, and ultimately wait to hear what they are teaching me. Sometimes, I see pretty clearly what they are teaching and that brings up new fears. "Really?" I think, "You want me to look at that!?! How uncomfortable!"

It is the ego within us that resists change, because change is uncomfortable for the ego. The ego likes to run the show, be the know-it-all. It is the part of us that lives for applause, seeks to be validated from the outside, and greedily shouts "I AM!" When my fears bring up the discomforts of the ego, I can easily get caught in victim mode -- that place where I can see where everyone else needs to change except me.

As you can imagine, this isn't a very powerful position, thus the term "victim." It creates the illusion of safety; a safe place for the ego. If I am the victim, then I've done nothing wrong and don't need to change. I am the acted upon, the objectified, the passive. While this position stokes the ego, it keeps us stuck in the same pattern.

When we come up against a wall in our life, when we finally get pushed to the corner, when we have been criticized, marginalized, judged, energetically attacked, when we have accommodated the last recognized part of our soul in order to serve someone else -- that is obvious signal that something needs to change. That is when we need to look at our situation and courageously ask, "What is my part in this? Where in this sea of discomfort, ridicule and pain have I had a hand in its creation? What part of me is choosing this reality?"

Those are super scary questions. I know. My ego really likes me to be right. The ego says, "If you're wrong about this then there's something fundamentally wrong with you!" The ego gives us no space to be wrong. Luckily, we are not our ego. It just belongs to us. We are energetic beings filled with a Divine spark of consciousness. It is this space within us that gives us space for all that is. In this space, it is not that things are right or wrong, just that there are actions and consequences.

I got a little beaten down last week. I shined my light in places it wasn't welcome, and received a bit of an energetic and emotional beating. My sensitive friends, I'm sure you understand. It feels terrible.

It was difficult for me. I cried. I placed blame. I shouted insults into the air. I retreated into myself, into the bathtub, into a glass of wine, into a chocolate bar. The next morning, I went to a yoga class where we worked on mobilizing the sacroiliac joint -- the place in my body where there's already too much mobility and where I constantly work on providing stability. Throughout the class, I kept thinking, "This is terrible! This hurts! This isn't what I want or need at all!" Until I suddenly recognized: This is my favorite yoga class. With an instructor I really like. Which I'm practicing with a healthy body. My thoughts are ruining this for me.

I came home and started watching my thoughts, my emotions, and my reactions to them. My analyzer really wanted me to formulate "A Plan." A plan that would get me out of the situations that caused persistent pain and punishment energy. To get out of that situation at any cost and move on. Which has been the answer for me in the past. But something about that didn't feel right. And so I kept watching.

I watched, I exchanged readings with a friend, I started a few books I'd ordered to start shifting my perspective in a few key ways. And I realized that as bad as my negative situation was, I had created it and in some ways, I controlled the ways in which the negative energy affected me. Leave now, and I was doomed to repeat this lesson because I needed this lesson. I recognizes that I need to learn how to more fully fine-tune my protection tools, to allow my inner smile to shine through with my inner light, no matter who I'm on contact with.

So I've created a shift for myself in the form of a 40 day plan. I have 40 days to consistently and mindfully practice a tool that I've had but not fully utilized. Forty days to re-establish Ayurvedic routines that I lost when I let down my protection. Forty days to practice shifting my perspective on abundance and prosperity. Forty days to learn the lessons that I planned for myself to learn so that I don't have to learn them again when I move on.

Ayurvedic medicine is just one of the sources that claims that it takes 40 days to form a habit, or to reprogram our consciousness for the better. It's day two for me currently, and I'm excited to keep on it!

It's so important for us highly sensitive folks, us empaths, us easily anxious or worried, to take extra care of our bodies and minds. To learn to watch our emotions rather than reacting immediately. To nourish our nervous systems with luxurious routines laced with self-love and self-care. To learn to protect our sensitive bodies from the moods, emotions, criticisms and energetic attacks of others. When we fail to do this, we can create a situation where we don't even trust our own bodies or our own emotions, because they are always betraying us.

But when we practice self-love, self-care, protection, healthy boundaries and responding rather than reacting to our emotions, we create a safe, nourishing place for our sensitive bodies and spirits to ground, to retreat and to enjoy so that we can more readily offer our sensitive gifts to the world.

Somedays, I Feel Like a Spy

Some days, I think I would make a perfect spy. On those certain days, people I interact with don't recognize me. I can walk by and wave stand next to them at the grocery store and all I get are blank stares.

Other days, I feel like I'm invisible all together. Just last night on the drive home from work, not one but two people nearly ran me over. They didn't see that I was there and they swerved into my lane. Twice in under three miles I had to slam on my brakes and swerve. Also, twice in under three miles, I yelled a string of cuss words that would make my dad stand up and salute. But I digress....

I've written ad nauseum about how we are energetic beings first and foremost, and that our energetic blueprint lives inside of and instructs our physical human bodies. If you've ever watched a really good actor, you see that the energy they embrace allows them to become a completely different character. In the same body, they become a different person. Which begs the question, if we can choose to play a character by changing our energy, then which character are you being today? And did you consciously choose it?

Today, I walked around in the neighborhood where I work part time as a physical rehabilitation specialist for folks with spinal injuries. Many of my clients work in one of the local businesses, and as I shopped for groceries during the lunch hour, I stood in line next to a regular client. I smiled, and he politely smiled in return, no form of recognition in his eyes. I could have said something, could have told him it was me, but instead I chose to watch the energy exchange as a type of experiment. On the way back to my car, I saw my co-worker through the window of our office and she had the same reaction -- a polite smile as she turned away. When I stopped and pulled the door open, she exclaimed, "I didn't even recognize you!"

You could say that both greetings were out of context. That we place certain people with certain contexts in order to remember them. Or that maybe I was wearing different clothes or had done my hair differently. Those things can both be true. But the other thing that changed was my energy, the vibration I was set at or the character I was choosing to play.

When the intention for my day is to be a rehabilitation specialist, my energetic vibration changes to support it. If I like the people I work with and enjoy my work environment, my vibration might also change a bit to match it. If my place of work has a strong brand or work ethos, my vibration might also change to match it.

When the intention for my day is to work as an intuitive healer, my vibration shifts accordingly. Because this is more along the lines of my dharma, or true life's work, my vibration rises quit a bit. In fact, I think it changes enough that I become a different character in the same body. In my intuitive healer character, those who interact with me from the rehabilitation specialist vibration may not recognize me.

Setting our energy, vibration or character is all about intention. When we set clear, grounded intentions with the Universe, we make energetic shifts automatically. Shifts in our personal energy field can happen instantaneously. Intentions for shifts in our environment, career or in other physical things may take more time.

I think of bigger intentions like turning on your turn signal in your car. When I was almost run over last night (twice!), I noticed that both of the culprits turned on their signal while they were changing lanes rather than before they changed lanes. They didn't look for space, didn't early signal their intentions, simply signaled while swerving. When we signal intentions for a lane change, where we're asking the Universe for a large change in our life, we need to give the Universe a little time to make space for our intention. Otherwise, we risk running someone over and creating chaos, rather than allowing for the perfect spot to open up for us.

When we set intentions for larger items, like job changes, abundance or health -- basically for anything outside of a simple vibrational change -- we must learn to be patient and have faith. When we don't, we risk creating chaos  -- chaos in our mind. How many times have you wished for something really bad and kept wishing and wishing to the point that the wish wasn't even fun anymore, but filled with anxiety? Intention setting, or manifesting, is about setting the intention (flipping on your turn signal), waiting for the Universe to make space for your request or having faith (waiting for the other drivers to make space) and being self aware to recognize our answer, even if it's not in the form we originally imagined (we get space behind the big truck, not the sports car).

Setting intentions for manifesting takes faith. Faith does not necessarily refer to any sort of theism but rather faith in the sense that there is a place for you on this planet. Faith that your heart-felt intentions and desires are heard. Faith that you are deserving, and faith that you are enough. When we set our vibration, our character, from this place -- this place of faith that we are enough -- then there is nothing that we can't manifest, change or create.

How Families Affect our Energy -- and a few tips for staying sane this holiday season

Every Sunday, my boyfriend and I do our weekly grocery shopping at the local co-op. Today was no exception, except that it seemed like all of Seattle agreed to meet at the co-op at the same time. Cans of pumpkin were hoarded into cards, along with cranberries, organic turkeys, potatoes, yams, pecan and pumpkin pies and lots and lots of wine.

Obviously, people are preparing for Thanksgiving. And my guess was that the more wine in the cart, the more they're spending it with their family.

Don't get me wrong -- I love my family with every ounce of my heart. I call both my parents and my sister weekly to talk about the trials, tribulations, successes and joys of each week. I feel blessed that my family is an integral part of my life and one of the only regrets I have about living in Seattle is the large distance between us.

My family also creates some of my most difficult spiritual and energetic challenges, and it is the energy that is most difficult for my clients to work through as well.

Raise your hand (come one, humor me) if you've experienced something like this: the holidays come around and you get really excited to see your family. You can't wait for mutual show and tell, the family traditions and rituals, and spending time together. For the first couple of days, everything feels amazing and you're so happy you made it. Then, after a little while, a melancholy sort of feeling sets in -- you start to feel a little down, perhaps frustrated, and maybe you start to question some of the choices you've made that aren't the same as your family's. For me, the overall feeling I get is of feeling stuck and confused for no reason that I can pinpoint.

Sound familiar? (If not, you're more rare than a unicorn underneath a rainbow of miracles. Good job, you).

When I read clients who have just spent a lot of time with their families, I often notice that their energy field is clogged with family energy. This is energy that says, "These are our family norms/belief systems/standard operating procedures. You've deviated from this program. Here is a reminder to get you back on track." Clients feel stuck because this energy is laying on top of their own innate energy and acting like a control.

You can think of it like a computer virus. You've got all of your energetic programs running smoothly, exactly the way you want them. You're creating your own way in the world, setting your energy high and manifesting your dreams, then all the sudden your software starts to act a little weird. Everything slows down and before you know it, you're not controlling your computer anymore -- the virus is.

Our energetic field is responsible for our whole reality. It is an intricate and elaborate system created from our belief systems, karmic patterns, past time information, present time thought patterns, emotions and creativity. We can compare our energetic field to a computer system -- a healthy energetic field is running completely on its own energy in order to create its reality, just like a healthy computer system is running only on the programs we chose for our operating system. An unhealthy energy system is one running on pre-programmed ideas or lies hidden as truths, just like an unhealthy computer system is stuck or inefficient because of crap software that we don't really use, viruses, spy ware and malware.

So, back to how family energy can act as a virus.  In order for a virus to be effective, the person planting the virus must intricately understand the system, and the system must have a weakness in order for the virus to be successful. When we are born, we knew very little about how to survive in the world. We looked to our parents to supply us with information about how the world works. In essence, we actively allowed our families to program our energetic system for us. We had to -- our survival depended on it! But it doesn't any more. Part of becoming an adult is separating from ideas and beliefs that we don't resonate with, which often means a continual separation from the energy that was pre-programmed into us and a move to reprogram our energy system with our own ideas and values.

This is how energy healings work. When I work with a client, I'm basically helping them wipe their energetic hard drive of anything that's contributing toward ill health, feeling stuck, or otherwise not serving them so that they can replace those energies with their own creativity, beliefs and personal power. When we stand in our own energy, we feel better, more ourselves. Our self esteem increases and we are able to have more certainty about our life path.

It's relatively easy to clean the energy body of foreign energy, especially of co-workers, friends, acquaintances and even romantic partners. These energies are more like extra programs that you download from the internet -- they may benefit you in the short term, but eventually they can start to cause problems. When they do, you can just uninstall. But family energy works more like a virus because that's the energy you started your life with. Family energy understands your system completely because it created your first belief systems, emotional patterns, thought patterns, and the basic, underlying story you have about your life. That story creates energetic pictures about who we are at a base level. Family energy recognizes these pictures and says, "Haha! You're still mine! You have my blueprint! You've deviated a bit, but it doesn't mean you don't recognize me! Match me, match me!"

I am in no way saying that our beloved families are consciously malicious (at least, mine aren't -- you can decide that for yourself). The impact of family energy is unconscious on the part of the family members -- it's more like their love, hope, worry and fear are more easily channelled into our sensitive systems. Family energy just works differently in our bodies than the energy of others. As one of my psychic colleagues said the other day, "You can learn and grow as a psychic, and move more and more energy and become less and less reactive to people and situations around you. But when family is involved, all bets are off."

So what can we do about it? Before I go into a family situation, I take extra time to get grounded, set my energy, hold my vibration and take extra self-pampering tools with me. I check in with myself throughout the visit to notice if I'm still holding my vibration. I set up extra energy readings and healings with my colleagues.  And I always try to employ the two best tools of all -- neutrality, and lots and lots of amusement. This holiday season, I suggest you read through my old posts that include these tools and try them for yourself.

If all else fails, at least you've got the wine  :)

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Tool #4: The First Essential Step to Healing: Havingness

As we start to move into the holiday season, we often start to think of all the things we're asked to give. Give thanks, give presents, give time, give energy, give give give give give. Don't get me wrong, giving is great! When done in the right attitude, it helps us cultivate gratitude, which helps us find more contentment and ultimately, joy.

The work I do is mainly with highly sensitive people. Those of us who are sensitive know how to give -- it's part of our nature. Being sensitive often means that you're very aware of the emotions of others and often feel uncomfortable around negative energy. Because the sensitive body is so affected by the energy of others, sensitive individuals often avoid conflict in order to shield themselves from energy onslaught. Often times, this creates a sensitive person who has learned to give or accommodate under almost any circumstances.

But one thing that these clients often lack is the ability to receive and to own something simply in order to have it for themselves. Instead, everything they allow themselves to receive is because it will somehow benefit someone other then themselves. They feel a tremendous amount of guilt when it comes to having something that is just their own, a secret jewel just for them, just because. In healing, we have to be able to HAVE and receive healing in order for us to heal.

Sounds simple, right?

For so many of us, we practice giving on a daily basis -- that is, giving to others. What we don't do is practice giving love, affection, or attention to ourselves. One of the primary reasons I see clients struggle with healing is a failure to allow themselves to have it. This often manifests as an underlying belief in their deservedness to have or to receive.

What if we were all allowed to have everything we wanted, as long as the desire was manifested in our hearts and fed by Source energy? Guess what, we do! Our deepest desires and fears are reflected to us in our reality. The spirit knows it can have whatever it needs to learn and grow, plus the things it wants to keep the body comfortable while achieving growth. But so often, our bodies and minds have been programmed into believing that we have to be deserving of something in order for us to have it.

The spirit world doesn't work that way. It is human to say that something is right or wrong, good or bad, or that someone is deserving or undeserving. The spirit world doesn't see good or bad, right or wrong, it just sees what is. I'm sure we can all think of someone who is a total schmuck who has everything they want. That person may have a sketchy moral character, but they also have high havingness.

Havingness = our ability to have.

Think about how much you really let yourself have. I know that in my life, I have high havingness in learning experiences, good cars, keeping good friends and living in beautiful places, to name a few. Where I'm constantly working on my havingness is in my ability to receive and believe praise and in my finances.

Our level of havingness affects our health and healing, too. If you've been struggling with your health, take a moment to check in with yourself and notice how much you're able to let yourself have healing. Be honest with yourself. I check in using a psychic tool and visualize a gauge out in front of me, but you can also simply ask yourself how much you let yourself have your healing and trust the first answer you get. Maybe it says, "40%." Ouch, but you can work with that and raise it up.

In a reading, I can help you look at your havingness and help you discover what is keeping you from having your health and healing. From my experience from working with clients, I find that it often comes from a feeling of not being deserving, not being good enough, not knowing who you would be as a healthy person and being afraid to find out, being afraid of losing the attention that being ill attracts, and believing that you are a victim of your own body.

You are none of those things. You are an infinitely creative spirit in a body that you created.

Our body puts out signals to alert us that something is wrong. In order to fix it, we first need to tune in and try to figure out what our body needs from us. Next, we need to seek a treatment that resonates with us. We also need to identify and release the energy, belief systems or programs that made us ill in the first place. But in order to all of that, we must first believe that we can have our health and healing. We must first believe that we truly own our bodies.

How do we create havingness? Raising our havingness is a practice that involves understanding that we are inherently deserving of having the life and health that we desire and that when our health is off, it is our choice whether to stay a victim or take action. Taking action means more than going through the motions of healing -- it means digging deep and noticing whether there are beliefs you have about yourself that need to change and then making a commitment to changing those no matter how uncomfortable or ego-compromising it is.

When I notice my havingness is low for a particular area in my life, there are two ways I deal with it. First, I ask myself why my havingness might be low. Usually, I notice it's because it deals with an area of my life that I'm not completely comfortable in, have been hurt in, or haven't wanted to look at. Next, I ask myself, "What's my first step to raising havingness?" Usually, my body asks me to release an old belief I have. As I work on releasing it, I replace it with a positive, concrete affirmation. For example, if I have low havingness about finances and my spirit tells me it's because my belief says that making money isn't spiritual, I might use the affirmation, "When I prosper in my divinely-inspired mission, the world prospers with me."

There is a psychic tool for increasing havingness that's a bit more simple if you have a regular meditation practice. After grounding and calling back your energy, you can imagine a bubble out in front of you. In the bubble, as a gauge to appear with your level of havingness. Notice the number. Now ground your gauge to the center of the planet and allow the grounding chord to release from the gauge any energy that's not allowing you to have what you want/need. See the energy move to the center of the planet. You may be able to identify it, but you don't have to. Watch your gauge, it may have moved upward. If not, take your psychic finger and move it up to 100%.

Sounds easy, right? It is!

Well, it is unless you're not ready to release the reasons keeping you from having your healing.

Havingness is also about ownership. It's about coming to the realization that this body was giving to YOU and YOU alone. The only thing that holds you prisoner in your own body is you. Once you realize that you create your prison or oasis you can take ownership of your creation and begin to create your own healing path -- no matter how many times you've been hurt by others, used by others, given to others, your healing path can be no one's but yours. Own it!

Psychic Myths Debunked

This week, Hay House Radio is hosting a "Best of Hay House World Summit." That basically means that they've taken some of their best authors, brought them together to have conversations about a wide variety of spiritual topics, and are broadcasting these talks all week long, for free. (If you're into all things spiritual and you're not sure what Hay House is, please check them out). On Sunday, I listened to a great talk between John Edward and John Holland, two well known psychic mediums, about psychic fact or fiction. The things they talked about are such common misconceptions about the work that I and other psychics do that I wanted to share some of their thoughts along with my own.

First, a little clarification of terms. Most of you notice that I don't use the term "psychic"very often to describe the work I do. This is because I feel like this term carries a lot of negative connotations. Psychics have long been cast as scary witches, crazy people, and those who have lost touch with reality. And, frankly, there are a lot of fakes out there who use the term to wield a false sense of power. The only place I use the term psychic in my business is when I'm speaking directly to that audience. Today, I'll be using that term a lot, so let me define it.

A psychic is simply someone who makes use of their innate intuitive abilities, which usually include a mixture of clairvoyant (ability to intuitively see pictures of information), clairaudient (ability to hear information), and clairsentient or empathic (the ability to feel information) abilities. As a move through this post, I'll try my best to explain some of the myths out there about psychics and provide the truth as I understand it.

Some people call themselves psychic. Others call themselves a medium. Others still use the term psychic medium. A medium is different from a psychic, and is a person who speaks to those who have passed over to the other side. Psychics can be mediums and vice versa. The difference is that, while some psychics can gain snippets of information from loved ones who appear during readings, they don't usually have the ability to have full conversations with passed spirits. In the interview I listened to, John Holland stated that he believed that mediums were born and not trained. After receiving much psychic training, I would tentatively say that I agree with him.

I am a psychic, not a medium. In my readings, I sometimes receive small pieces of information from passed loved ones, always in the context of what I'm reading, as if they want to add something. But I don't often see or communicate with the dead.

This leads me to Psychic Myth Number 1: Only some people are psychic

Everyone is intuitive, or psychic. Just like any other ability, you have to train and practice in order to develop it. And just like some people are naturally better at sports or writing than others, some people will naturally be better developing their psychic abilities. Just because I'm not naturally good at tennis (and I'm not, trust me), doesn't mean that I can't play. It will take me more training and practice to become a pro, but if I love it, I can get there.

Everyone has the ability to "listen to their gut," or "trust their inner voice." Doing this is following your intuition or being psychic. The first psychic skills you learn to develop are those that tell you more about yourself, your anatomy as a spirit, and the tools and concepts needed to navigate the intuitive realm.

That being said, if you want to develop your intuitive skills, it's really important that you choose a method that supplies you with tools to navigate the psychic world. I've been sharing some of the tools I use in readings because they are central to the work I do. When a surgical student starts medical school, they aren't handed a scalpel and told to start cutting someone else. Instead, they're taken through years of learning about physical anatomy, pathology, and how the body works. Then they practice, practice, practice, before they start performing surgery on others. It's the same with psychic skills. You first must learn to ground yourself in the knowledge of spiritual anatomy before you start learning to work with others.

I've really enjoyed learning through several psychic schools that share similar teaching principles -- the Berkeley Psychic Institute, Spirit is Calling and, locally in Seattle, Psychic Awakenings. All have beginner meditation classes and workshops for beginners to start to play with your intuitive skills. But just like there are several medical schools or sports programs, these aren't the only schools out there. Like anything else, do some research and see what resonates with you.

Psychic Myth Number 2: Psychics are Always "On"

Just because you play tennis for a living doesn't mean you carry your racket with you into a restaurant, right? Similarly, just because I conduct intuitive sessions for a living doesn't mean that I'm reading you intuitively while we're out for coffee. I'm not.

Keeping with my tennis analogy -- when you're on the court, there's a lot you have to field. You have to estimate where your opponent might hit the ball, what kind of spin there is, where your shot should land, how tired you are, etc. It's exhausting work! Good thing you can walk off the court when the game is done!

As a psychic, when I'm in a reading, I have to be aware not only of the energy of the person I'm reading, but of my energy -- I need to keep my emotional and survival energy low, I need to stay grounded and keep the readee grounded. I need to keep the reading space free and clear of outside energy. I have to shield myself from outside energy and the energy of the readee so that I'm not not "taking on" their energy or being influenced by it. This can become exhausting, too! Just like any other profession, we have the ability to turn off the psychic screen when we're finished with our reading.

Also, reading people without their permission is psychic attack. Just like a tennis pro wouldn't go around hitting people with tennis balls to try and get them to play, an ethical psychic won't go around reading people without their permission. On the show "Long Island Medium," Theresa Caputo regularly goes up to people on the street and tells them what their loved ones are communicating to her. The show always shows these happy, sappy responses that probably are heart felt. While I enjoy her show, I think that style of "attack reading" is unethical.

So next time we're having coffee, remember that I may be picking up information about my surroundings intuitively. Intuition and spirituality is the lens through which I see the world. So I may notice that the barista is hiding some greif, or that I feel uncomfortable by the couple arguing silently in the corner because my sensitive shell picks that up. I may notice that you feel aggravated or joyful or whatever it is that you're feeling. But I'm not reading your thoughts or trying to pick up more than I need to in that moment. That would be truly exhausting.

Psychic Myth Number 3: Psychics Read Your Mind

Psychics do not read minds. They read energy. Psychics have the ability to read your energy field as it is currently. If your energy changes, which it does constantly, a psychic can read that, too. Sometimes, your energy field is projecting a question that you've been throwing around in your mind. I remember once during a reading, I looked at the third chakra of my client and inside was a big question mark and the word, "ego." I said, "It looks like you have questions about the ego." She replied, "Oh my god, I've been thinking about that all night!" So it may have seemed like I read her thoughts, but I really just read her energy, which at the time was a reflection of her thoughts.

Psychic Myth Number 4: Psychics Predict the Future 

.....in movies. They predict the future in movies with a crystal ball. But like I just stated above, psychics have the ability to look your energy as it exists now. It's like John Holland said on Hay House Radio, that psychics have the ability to tell you about the highway you've been on, the twists and turns you've taken to get there, and which exits are available to you. I would add that, in times of transition, I can help you look at the energy of those "exits" to see what challenges or opportunities each would present. But we all have free-will -- you ultimately choose your own destiny.

A bit more about predicting the future -- there are a lot of psychics out there today who claim to know future events. Many of these psychics use the help of spirits that they channel into their bodies. I call these psychics "Transmediums," as they are inviting the spirit of another being into their body and then gathering information. While I believe that transmediumship can be a valid form of gathering information, it is a skill that takes a lot of practice and a very solid foundation in psychic skills in order to stay protected and receive valid information. I tend to take channeled information with a grain of salt, especially as it pertains to future events, but you are always free to make your own decisions about such information.

Our current reality is based on our thoughts, feelings and perceptions -- our energy. I've described before my thoughts on fate and destiny -- your fate is the deck of cards you are dealt. Your destiny is how you play your cards. Similarly, the current state of humanity and our world is based on the overall energy of humans at this point in time. Thus, our future is changeable and predicting it is like trying to throw a lasso around the wind. The more we each work with our energy to create the reality we want for ourselves and for our world, the more that future worldly events will reflect that.

Psychic Myth Number 5: All Psychics Want To Be Famous!

There is a certain power to any profession. We live in a culture that values fame, fortune and power. Being psychic, or being in any field that claims to "have answers," tends to attract a lot of attention from others. Some attention is good, other attention is not so good. People today want answers. They want reassurance and validation of their choices and their existence. What you'll find in a true psychic reading are simply the answers that are inside of you. In a true psychic reading, the psychic reads just your energy field and the answers you have displayed there. They do not tell you what you should do or judge you for past mistakes. They objectively show you what IS, and let you decide what to do.

I "came out of the psychic closet" in order to help people. Understanding my energy field has been a tremendous help in understanding my world and my relation to my world. It's been a gift in my life that I want to share with others. I have always been drawn to intuitive arts, and how the health of the energy body reflects in our physical body more than any other thing I've done or studied. This field of self inquiry has been a gift in my life and I simply want to share it with you.

The more I put myself out there and gain new clients, the more energy I have to be able to handle. I am a highly sensitive person, which allows me to do the intuitive work I do so naturally. However, it's a double-edged sword. As I grow into a bigger business, my ability to handle the attention, admiration, questions, concerns, resentment, jealousy and any other energy thrown at me by my clients must grow as well. It requires a lot of personal work, skill growth and meditation for me to keep up with it. Most psychics I know feel the same.

With any amount of power comes responsibility. A responsible psychic is not one who wishes to be famous, but rather to help people. Helping people at a psychic level requires that the psychic be grounded firmly in their own practice of skills and knowledge, and that they monitor their level of business growth equal to the amount of energy they can handle.

Psychic Myth #6: All Psychics Are Fakes and Shouldn't be Trusted

There is a lot of pressure in our culture to laugh at any information that doesn't have a firm foundation in science. However, science itself is simply a belief system. I am a scientist -- and I have two advanced degrees to prove it. But I firmly believe that there are other ways of knowing and understanding the world.

Some psychics are fakes. And unlike tennis pros, it can be harder to tell if a psychic is faking. Trust your gut. If the psychic is playing on your fears rather than reading your whole energy, asking general questions to gain answers, or claiming they see your future clearly, they're probably a fake. If they've done no training and have no skill set or qualifications, they may either be a fake or an amateur without proper training. We all get to have our own thoughts, feelings and opinions about the world. Let your inner voice guidance tell you what is real and truth for you.

Please let me know if you have any questions about this topic or the spiritual world in general. I will answer to the best of my abilities. Like anyone, I am still learning and I do not have anywhere near all the answers! I am having fun on my own journey and through the process of helping others. Thanks for reading.

Spiritual Tool #3: Filling up with YOU!

How many times have you come home from a day and said, "I feel so drained!"? If you're like me, it happens regularly, especially when around lots of people, when helping lots of clients throughout the day, or when intense or stressful situations present themselves. This post is about helping you call your energy back, which makes you feel more grounded, yourself, and literally gives you more physical energy!

In my post about grounding, I talked about how our energy bodies can be like little sponges, picking up energy from other people -- people we talk to, care for, or interact with. That entry talked about the importance of clearing or grounding those outside energies away after each day.  But just as we pick up other people's energy, we often give our energy to other people, events, or projects. Sometimes we leave our energy there, in the past, where it really does us no good. In order to keep our energy levels high, we need to fill back up with us!

The only moment that we have to work with is the present. When our energy is in the past, or the future, or with mom, or with your latest craft project, or planning dinner, we don't have as much energy available to work with in the present moment. I'm sure we've all experienced it before -- we are excited about a new project, or we have a family member or situation we're worried about, and so our energy is focused there while we try to move throughout our day and complete our day-to-day tasks. We find ourselves becoming sloppy, unable to concentrate, and feel completely wiped out by the end of the day.

It doesn't do us any good to keep our energy anywhere but right inside our body and aura. It's been said that worry is a misuse of imagination. I say energy directed anywhere except the present moment is a cheat to ourselves and the lives we're creating.

So many of us in the healing field struggle with this. We worry about our clients, or we continuously try to problem-solve other's situations while we're going through the motions of present day activities. Even those outside the healing field can relate -- we've all experienced a loved one who is going through a tough time, and often we feel emotionally connected or responsible for their well-being.  Often, we keep our thoughts or prayers with them and forget about the quality and importance of our own attention in the present moment.

Guess what -- that doesn't serve either party.

If my energy is with one of my sick clients, not only is it not with me, but it's also clogging up their space and keeping them from being able to find their most authentic self and their own healing solution. It is always best to keep our energy with us so that we can use the power of the present moment to direct all of our energy to the focal point at hand.

Our attention is the most powerful tool we own. If we can gather up all of our energy and direct our attention at just one thing, the rest of the world falls away. We've all experienced this -- maybe in a yoga class where you observed your thoughts rather than listening to them, or when you become so focused on a project that you lost track of time and created your best work. As a healer, I know I can help my client best by focusing on them and only them in a session, or when I'm doing extra research to help them -- not by focusing on them while I'm blogging, making dinner, or listening to my partner.

So how do we practice calling our energy back to us and keeping it there? (Because, remember, it's ALL a practice).

It's simple. Sit in your meditation space and ground yourself. Use the grounding meditation listed here. Start by clearing away all those energies that you might of picked up during the day -- your client, that stranger on the bus who gave you the eyes, that cute barista who drew a heart in your cappuccino, -- all of it! Once you feel clear, start to imagine all the places you might have left your energy that day. I usually start with my dream space, which is generally very active. Then, I call my energy back from clients, from my mom, from anyone I might be healing inadvertently, from my boss, from that person on the bus I gave the eyes to, from my enjoyment of my (decaf) cappuccino, and from any other situation or project that keeps stealing my attention.

Imagine that energy collecting into a big ball of golden energy above your head that is as big as you are. Let that golden ball of light fill all the way up with your energy in present time. When it's full, pull it down around you and let it fill up your whole body and aura with your energy. Do this several times until you feel full of the live that is YOU. You can't have too much!

Often with this exercise, I get asked if calling energy back will hurt or affect the people, projects or situations where your energy was left. Calling your energy back will not hurt someone you've been helping -- like I said before, your energy of worry or healing, while fabulous in the present moment, can create confusion for that person once you've moved on physically. Your heartfelt intention of help or healing, when used in the power of the present moment, is beneficial. Once you move on, if your energy doesn't move with you, it can create the same energy of confusion and clogging that we clear out of our own spaces.  Similarly, your projects can't keep moving forward if you're working on something else, so it's more effective to always have your energy in the present moment. The same goes for situations or interpersonal relationships -- focus on the task at hand while it's at hand and communication will be smoother (that doesn't mean you can't procesas and reflect later, just make sure that's you're intention at the time).

Have you ever heard someone say, "I'm running on a quarter tank today?" This is often how full our bodies are of our own energy, but it doesn't have to be. Fill up with the golden light of your energy several times per day and keep your energy gauge at full all the time.

You always deserve to be full of YOU. This isn't about ego, it's about spiritual energy. In the spiritual world, you can't get enough of yourself, so fill up! When you are full of yourself and clear from other energies, that is your quiet, soft space where you can hear the clear voice of your soul. This is where you'll make your best decisions, heal yourself, and start to have an effect on others because you're brave enough to fill up and be your own creature. Here's to being YOU!

Spiritual Tool #2: Holding a Vibration

Albert Einstein said, "Everything is energy and that's all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics."

One of the ways in which I work with clients is to help them get out of the uncomfortable reality they're in and into the reality they want. Usually, there are a lot of belief systems, family programming energy, emotions, fear or guilt keeping them from embracing the reality they want to claim as their own. As I work with clients, I help them to identify these limiting patterns, drain them from the energy body, and help them start creating the reality they want through energy.

How do we do this?

Similar to how Einstein said to "match the frequency," I say, "hold the vibration" of the reality you want and you will have it.  On one hand, it sounds so simple. On the other hand, it seems incredibly complex and perplexing and perhaps even illogical to our analyzing mind.

The spiritual world, and thus our energy bodies which are our link to Spirit, operate in an arena where time and space do not exist. Our bodies, and more accurately our minds, experience time linearly, which can make spiritual concepts seem illogical. But you know how sometimes you set a goal, and maybe you send out prayers asking that you reach your goal, but the goal always seems to be out in the future? That's because the Universe responds to us in present time only. In the spiritual world, you either have something or you don't, there is no "getting it later."

This is why the vibration of our aura in relation to the reality we want to have are so important. Similarly, this is why affirmation as mantra and as prayer is so effective -- we are no longer asking to have something in the future some day, we are stating to the Universe that we already have it.

To some of us, this may seem selfish. Especially when it comes to goals around finances or achievement.  Many of us in the spiritual field incorrectly assume that self-serving goals aren't spiritual, but that's untrue. The Universe wants us to be fulfilled. It wants us to have our hearts desire and will give us the reality that is reflected in our energy body and in our thoughts.

This doesn't mean that receiving what we want won't require some work. Spiritual growth always requires work. But by showing the Universe exactly what we want through holding the vibration of the reality we desire, the work will illuminate itself, pushing our bodies and minds through linear time more quickly to achieve our new reality. The work may manifest itself as taking a deep look at our belief systems, our relationships, our value or our self esteem and making the changes necessary to fully vibrate at our new reality.

So, how do we start? The work for changing our reality starts, like most spiritual tools, in meditation. This is how I like to use the "hold your vibration" meditation, but you may find that another method works better for you, so feel free to play with it.

Sit quietly in your meditation space. I like to sit in a chair with my feet on the ground, or include this meditation before I start a yoga practice so that the movement helps me clear out blockages. Again, it's up to you. First, become grounded. You can use the grounding technique I've described in another post, or choose a grounding technique of your own. Breath deeply and smoothly, and allow any stresses or uncomfortable energy to ground out of your space.

Once you feel clear, allow yourself to visualize the reality that you want. Maybe this is surrounding a health issue, finances, or relationships -- whatever it is, see your best and most vibrant reality out in front of you. Allow any negative energy or negative self talk drain out of your vision naturally. Notice how it looks -- I like to attach a color to the vibration, so that I can easily call it back later on. Notice how your reality feels -- every cell in your body will respond to the vibration you choose, so allow yourself to really feel that vibration.

Next, use your hands (or your psychic hands) to pull that visualization into your body, starting at the crown of your head and moving all the way down to your feet. Visualize yourself bathed in that reality, perhaps seeing yourself in the color you chose. Allow yourself to feel that vibration in every part of your body, and allow yourself to know that this reality is yours right now. Send some gratitude to the Universe for helping you with your creation.

Throughout the day, check in with yourself and your vibration. When you find yourself slipping into old thought patterns or behavioral habits that aren't in alignment with your vibration, take some deep breaths and call the color of your vibration back around your body. Notice the thought patterns that you were stuck in and work on releasing those in your meditation practice. Assert an affirmation in place of negative thoughts. The affirmation, "I easily create the reality I most deeply desire," may work well for this meditation, but feel free to chose another one.

Getting started on a spiritual journey can seem daunting, but remember that you have the full support of the Universe behind you. A spiritual journey is the process of self-discovery -- finding out who you are, who you want to be, and how to get there. If you find yourself stuck, I am only a phone call away. I'd be happy to provide some clarity and build your confidence so you can move freely along your path.

First Tool: Grounding

Those of us following a spiritual path, or taking yoga classes now and then, or even just exposed to spiritual culture in general, might often hear about the concept of grounded. "I was so grounded!" Is a phrase you might hear people exclaim. Or "Wow, I really need to take some time and just ground."

What does grounding mean?

When I first heard about "grounding," I had a vague sense that it meant somehow chilling out for a few hours or days and letting yourself "settle in." Usually, grounding referred to settling in to some new situation, life event, or during or after a long stint of travel.

Trying to get "grounded" without understanding the mechanism was like watching women get pregnant when I was six years old -- both seemed like something you waited around for and then just happened some day. If you don't understand the mechanism for achieving a state of being, either energetic or physical, it's going to be a lot more difficult to get there and to recognize yourself in that state (well, except for pregnancy... I'd imagine you'd notice).

When I started receiving intuitive readings around the age of 20, one of the first feedbacks I almost always received was that I needed to be more grounded. I still had a vague sense of what it meant to attain grounding and what it felt like to be there. Let's talk about being grounded verses being ungrounded and what the two states mean for operation as a spiritual being on the planet.

Grounding means that we are connecting with the earth. A state of groundedness allows us to recognize, own, and utilize our connection to planet earth. The earth provides us with a solid foundation to literally set foot on -- if you've ever experienced vertigo or been in an earthquake, you know how important it is to feel the steady earth underneath you. For a moment, think of the main quality of earth -- that's it's stable or solid. Just like a stable, solid friend will always be with you during hard times, a shoulder to cry on or someone to talk to when things get tough, the earth is always there for us for stability.

The stabilizing quality of the earth provides our foundation for feeling grounded. Grounding to the earth also provides us with a mechanism for releasing energies that aren't ours, or that aren't serving us. Just like we might process our troubles with a stable friend, we can continually release energy to the earth, for it has the energetic ability to absorb our energy, recycle it, and make it available to us again in a form we can better use. We see this ability of the earth scientifically through large old growth forest -- large, old trees sequester carbon from the atmosphere, pulls it into their bodies, and releases oxygen instead. The earth is a great recycler of nutrients and energy. When we are connected to it, we can process energy more effectively.

What happens when we're not grounded? Many of us spend most of our lives ungrounded. In an ungrounded state, we lose the capability to release outside energies effectively or efficiently, so we often operate in a muddled energetic space. Because grounding helps to connect our energy bodies to the planet, including all of our chakras, being ungrounded can cause excess or outside energy in our chakras to run all over our aura or to spill outside of our aura.

One of the best and most extreme examples of being ungrounded is when you are drunk. After a few drinks, the light and hot qualities of the alcohol release our grounding the planet. We are unable to make stable decisions based on what is best for us, and we feel uninhibited by the heavier parts of life. Another example is when you've worked on the computer or watched TV for too many hours at a time, and when you step away, you feel like you're in "digital world" -- your brain feels foggy, you groggily walk over to the fridge and grab something to sip on unconsciously, or a bag of potato chips to munch on. We also can become ungrounded when we're thinking creatively. Being ungrounded isn't necessarily a bad thing. The space of being ungrounded can be a lot of fun -- we might have great or creative ideas or be really productive on a project.

So why get grounded? Gathering creative ideas is great, but executing them comes from being grounded. When it comes time to sort the good ideas from the messy ones, grounding is what helps us to achieve that. Watching a marathon of Grey's Anatomy can be a great stress release, but grounding is what will bring you back to the real world and allow you to release all the emotional ups and downs you felt while watching it. Grounding brings us back to our very exciting reality on earth so that we can create as spirits exactly what we want to create.

Okay, so how do we do it? Grounding can be simple, and it takes some practice. Sit in a chair with your feet flat on the ground. Close your eyes. Imagine all of your energy gathering around you into your aura, which extends from your skin to about an arms length all around you. Feel your energy centering in the center of your head, which is behind your eyes and between your ears. Simple know that your energy is here. Then, visualize a grounding chord forming from your first chakra (which is at the base of your spine) down into the earth beneath you and extending all the way to the center of the planet.

Make sure the grounding chord is as wide as your hips. You can visualize it in any color or shape you want -- you can build a skyscraper reaching downward, or use a tree with roots, or use a color or shape you like. Have fun with it! It doesn't have to be perfect; imagine that you are in kindergarten as you draw your chord. Once it reaches the center of the earth, let it grow roots and stabilize itself there. Then, give your grounding chord a "release" switch. With your psychic finger, turn your grounding chord to "release," and allow that any energy in your body is heavy and releases from your grounding chord to the center of the earth.

Grounding might feel strange if you haven't done much of it before, but ultimately your body will like it here much more. By being grounded, you now have a better ability to process and remove energy that's not yours, freeing your space up to hold more of your vital energy! Like I said, the earth is a great recycler and will know what to do with the energy you give it. Keep releasing and feeling your connection to this great planet we live on!